Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Humility: Getting Beyond the Ordeal


It’s not often—if I’ve even done it at all—that I’ve used the Rock to share my opinions or feelings. Generally, I keep postings limited to information helpful for writers (which I avoid opining in because I don’t consider myself an expert), promo, and some goofy entertainment from time to time.

But now there’s something heavy on my heart. To all our friends…my friends…please know that ol’ Gusto is a changed man.

Recently, I received a pretty crushing blow. Everyone is okay and in good health, including myself. But my world was shattered. And it really kind of came down to: I deserved it.

In many cases with loved ones, friends, and colleagues, I was a supreme ass. Sure, writers typically are a wee bit full of themselves, but I was pretty miserable, a lot of times placing myself first because of some pain in my earlier life that I constantly refused to deal with even when someone who loved me pleaded that I do so, and voilà—I only made myself worse. I fanned the flames of my insecurities and acted foolishly.

Slapped awake, I now know my mistakes so well that they jolt me like electricity each day. The only way for me to climb out of this is to change. I can’t undo my stupidity. But I can live everyday embracing the good that surrounds me like the Garden of Eden. It was because I refused to see these gifts, that I became so distorted. Never again.

There are quite a few acquaintances to whom I owe apologies. This posting is just an intro. I prefer to make my amends to these people personally, so it will be over time, but rest assured, I’ll chat with you and look forward to the camaraderie.

Lots of changes going on in my life’s play right now. They’re keeping me on my toes and making me sharp. I look forward to the waves settling down, though, because once they do, I want to REALLY give back for all the blessings I still have.

To put it in writing terms, I’m going to weather the ordeal and come out with the great lesson and the gimmick (a phrase coined by Dwight Swain) to overcome the dark spirits in the final act of the story. May the force be with me. I’ve already thrown away my light saber, because Jedi don’t give in to fear. J
 
Ernest Hemingway said, “There is nothing noble in being superior to your fellow man; true nobility is being superior to your former self.” 

Love you all,

Dave (still with some gusto that will be bouncing back soon)

P.S. Would love to hang out with writer buddies in any way. Need to be sociable.

15 comments:

Shannon Baker said...

It takes a big person to learn from mistakes! Love and support to you, with all the Gusto I've got going your way!

Karen Duvall said...

HUGS! Sometimes it takes an epiphany to give us a whole new perspective on life. Best of luck to you, my friend!

Julie Luek said...


Your heart shines through.

Sisters of the Quill said...

A few sharp slaps, that nudger named Time, and being a sensitive human. You are getting there. Your attitude about it is right on. Go Dave and keep your head up. Call if you need to. Admiration, Karen Lin

Janet Fogg said...

The strength of friends have your back, Dave. I'm proud to call myself one of them. Janet

Pat Hatt said...

Yeah sometimes life can be a pain, but it can show us a whole new lane.

Chiseled in Rock said...

Thanks, everyone.

Davo

fpdorchak said...

Gusto, kudos for taking the steps you are and taking ownership of whatever's "at" you. I admire your...gusto, pardo the pun---but it's apt! Look how you're handling your situation. Wish you all the best...because NONE of us are perfect, we"re all learning. Chin up.

Peg Brantley said...

This post is pretty powerful. I read it earlier but felt uncomfortable commenting since I really don't know you.

You're obviously taking some giant steps in terms of growth, which is what all of us want (and dread).

I wish you well.

Vicki Sue Law said...

It's amazing how life slaps us upside the head sometimes. Your post is a reminder to us all. Thinking of you...

Charmaine Clancy said...

I've long learned to embrace humility. There was little other choice.

Chiseled in Rock said...

You you are a special someone I owe an apology to, Vicki.

Chiseled in Rock said...

Right on

Chiseled in Rock said...

Appreciate the kind words, Frank.

Patricia Stoltey said...

Big hugs, Dave. I know you're going to be fine.